Do you love Christmas? Do you also love anarchy?
Then this is the list for you!
There’s no reason you can’t be a Christmas fanatic and ALSO a punk.
There really is no reason that those two things should be mutually exclusive, anyway.
When it comes to Christmas songs, everyone always thinks about the classics, which are always old, inoffensive songs about snow and peace and goodwill toward men.
But there are dozens, hundreds even, of great Christmas songs that don’t fit this mould, and they should not be forgotten!
Plus, Fairytale of New York, one of the most famous (or infamous) Christmas songs ever, is by The Pogues, who are a punk band!
So in this list, I’m going to suggest 5 of the best punk Christmas songs to have ever been recorded, to help bring some variety (and noise) to your festive season.
There are a surprisingly large number of Christmas songs recorded by punk bands and this list is obviously very subjective, as is the case with anything about music.
So really, the title of this post should be ‘5 Punk Christmas songs that I happen to really enjoy’
But that’s not very good for SEO…
I have tried to pick 5 songs from different styles and subgenres of punk, so that whoever you are and whatever your musical preference may be, you will find something here that you enjoy.
1. Dickies – Silent Night
This cover song is by The Dickies, an incredible band who like to keep the fun and silliness alive and well in punk rock.
If you’ve not heard of them before, how can I best describe the band?
Let me put it this way: Did you ever see Killer Klowns from Outer Space?
Well, The Dickies did the theme song for it.
I think you can guess that this cover of Silent Night isn’t going to be traditional…
So why is this cover so great?
Well, it’s a very fast punk cover of Silent Night, honestly what else did you want? (Or expect?)
It is not a version of the song that you will have ever heard before, and it’s all the better for it.
Who wants to hear 20 versions of a song that all sound the same anyway?
Silent Night, a veritable classic, is a very quiet, sombre and slow song and it stayed that way in all the covers of it.
Before this cover, the most controversial version of this song was a Violin and Piano version that just didn’t sound very good!
The arrangement is hardly orthodox: The violin’s simple, double-stop-harmonized rendition veers into abrasive wrong notes, the piano layers in a deep, distant, dissonantly tolling bell, the duo ticks through the remaining verses like damaged clockwork.
Matthew Guerrieri
The Dickies deciding that this song was the one they wanted to do a speed-punk cover of was a stroke of genius, and ever weirder is that it actually sounds good, rather than the cacophony you may be expecting!
The song is as surprising as it as enjoyable!
2. Blink 182 – I Won’t Be Home for Christmas
This song is actually kind of sad and depressing, despite its upbeat and pop-punk sound.
However, it also tells a compelling story about people for whom the holidays AREN’T full of festivity and cheer.
Not everyone loves Christmas and this song hits that message home with a very greek tragedy of a story.
So why is it on this list? It sounds like a horrible song, being all sad and miserable.
But then again, Fairytale of New York is a Christmas classic, and that song is about an argument between a drunk and a drug addict couple.
Anyway, I Won’t Be Home For Christmas is on this list for two reasons.
The first is that the lyrics are darkly funny, witty and clever, and the song starts with a fake-out that I really appreciate, thematically.
“Outside the Carolers start to sing,
I can’t describe the joy they bring,
‘Cos Joy is something they don’t bring me”
I Won’t Be Home for Christmas – Blink 182
The second is that this song is just SO GOOD!
I genuinely get annoyed when I start singing this song in the middle of January and get told to stop because Christmas has gone now and I need to wait 12 months because I’m allowed to listen to it again!
3. Dropkick Murphys – The Season’s Upon Us
Another one from the ‘ironically funny songs about something horrible‘ list, this song by the Dropkick Murphys essentially takes the worst aspects of Christmas and makes a funny song about it.
The plot is that the lead singer is heading home for Christmas and so is the rest of his extended family.
What follows is some witty but harsh comments about how dreadful his family is.
“My nephew’s a horrible, wise little twit
He once gave me a nice gift wrapped box full of shit
He likes to pelt Carolers with icy snowballs
I’d like to take him out back and deck more than the halls”
The song is kind of like National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation, with all the comedic awfulness of the different family members, but condensed into a 4-minute song.
But underneath all the jokes and horribleness, the song actually has a message that is pro-family.
Your family may not be your kind of people, they may make bad life choices or just be really annoying people.
But they’re still family and at Christmas you put aside all the griping and complaints and just enjoy being together.
4. The Ramones – Merry Christmas (I Don’t Wanna Fight Tonight)
So many punk Christmas songs are either a sarcastic punk song or a punk band trying to make a stereotypical Christmas song.
I think the reason this song by The Ramones works so well is because of how it fits awkwardly between the two.
The song has a lot of the classic Christmas elements: jingling bells, a sad Christmas story and pleasant signing.
However, at its heart, it’s a Ramones song. It’s short, has some heavier guitar, a repetitive chorus and a fairly pessimistic take on a subject matter.
The song is oddly divisive and a lot of people don’t rate it at all.
Fans of Christmas songs see it as too punk-y, and fans of the Ramones don’t see it as a very good Ramones song.
But thats the magic of the song; because it is somewhere between the two. It could be put into a Christmas playlist or a Ramones playlist and it would fit in either. It would fit in an awkward and janky way, but it would fit.
5. Bad Religion – Christmas songs
Okay, so choosing an entire album for the top song here is maybe a bit of a cop out, so I will choose one song! Eventually.
First, let me just say that this entire album is absolutely top notch and I really suggest that you listen to the entire thing, and not just one song.
Greg Graffin has an absolutely wonderful voice and while these may be punk covers, full of fast guitars and drums, he could sing each of these songs a cappella and I would listen, entranced.
If I had to pick one song, then I will go for the third song, ‘O Come, O Come Emmanuel’.
The riff is so wonderfully light and bouncy, the song isn’t one I know especially well, so I don’t compare it to anything else, and the way Greg Graffin pronounces ‘Israel’ is amazing, for reasons I can’t quite explain.
And the album ends with the Bad Religion song ‘American Jesus’.
This song kind of puts everything back into perspective with the band’s more critical eye on Christmas, Christianity and Government.
Wrap Up
On the face of it, Punk and Christmas songs seem to be like pieces from two very different jigsaws: they just don’t go together.
But there is a surprisingly long history of punk bands covering Christmas songs.
The Vandals released a full Christmas album, Oi! To the World back in 1996. New Found Glory released a Christmas EP in 2012 and punk bands have been recording Christmas songs for as long as punk has been a thing.
And one of the last shows The Sex Pistols ever did was a Christmas gig, on Christmas Day itself, as part of a benefit for the Fire brigade union.
So this Christmas, you can still enjoy your Mariah Carey and Bing Crosby songs, but be sure to throw some Bad Religion or Dickies in there too, to liven things up and introduce your family to some great music.
